Redmond, Washington— Investegators are trying to track down the culprit(s) who were responsible for slipping an unknown quantity of LSD into Bill Gates’ drink.

It is believed that the crime was commited shortly before Mr. Gates held a press conference in Redmond earlier this week. The media event, scheduled for 20 minutes, lasted for several hours.

Witnesses say that the billionaire at first appeared to be very much himself, but soon became erratic and spent a lot of time touching his face and saying, “Wow, man!”

No charges have been laid at this time.

SCO is suing IBM for using Linux. They claim Linux is based in part on code from the Unix operating system that is SCO’s intellectual property.

Unix was invented more than 30 years ago by AT&T’s Unix Systems Laboratories, and the Unix ideas have spread widely since then. Linux works in many ways identically to Unix, making it relatively easy to translate Unix software to Linux.



AT&T sold the Unix intellectual property to Novell Networks, which in turn sold it to the Santa Cruz Operation. Caldera International, a seller of Linux, then acquired from SCO the Unix rights and two SCO products, OpenServer and UnixWare. Then last year, Caldera changed its name to SCO Group to reflect the fact that most of its revenue came from its SCO business and not from the Linux products.

Writer Mark F. Radcliffe has some interesting thoughts on the lawsuit:

Some unfortunate news regarding the “Star Wars Kid” (see this post). It seems that the family of the 15 year-old has hired a lawyer and is thinking about sueing the youth(s) that started a sensation when they posted the video to the internet. The only good news is that there are no plans to involve waxy.org in the lawsuit.

This lawsuit may be further complicated by the fact that the real Star Wars Kid has been found in India.